I’m Tired of the Music in the City of Accra

I have always told critics of ‘senseless’ music to shut up. Music, movies, art – whatever kind of entertainment – does not always have to make sense, edify, educate or be loaded with lessons. It can be thrilling, fun, emotive, escapist for its own sake. But...

But now I am tired. There’s no originality. We’re singing about boobs and booty and sex – with euphemism or not – and unwittingly confirming certain unfair, untrue, bigoted and wicked racial(ist) stereotypes. Mtcheew.

This Christmas – Dear Lord – please let me stumble upon 1 hiplife music video without push-up bras, shirts worn as dresses, shorts only big enough for cartoon characters, scary hair-dos, and tin swinging chains. I stop my request here or they will build a stairway to heaven.

Accra - Stunning as the Crow Flies

Sunday evening was magical if you gazed up in the City of Accra. The golden hologram disc of sun threw no rays – just a yellow glow; wrapping up the sky in an ecru crepe. But street-level surveillance was different – dirt, wrappers, leftover food and polythene everywhere. Accra may be gorgeous as the crow flies – thanks to nature – but what about the streets?

Ghana’s Best Leader(s)

I hallow history – all my ‘peeps’ know that. But when the news for one week is about the best government in Ghana since ’57 – whose was and whose was not – I get sick. If we could solve today’s problems by giving bragging rights to leaders from the past, then Election 2012 should be a contest between – let's see, which of them still alive today – Rawlings and Kufuor. Other politicians can go to sleep kodeeeeeee. Mtcheew.

My Mpotompoto Mind

Accra’s traffic is musk from a skunk on normal days, but the pre-Christmas traffic should make us all get a sanity exam. We have kept Ghanablogging meetings going for 2 years. We are not bored yet, but can you – if you’re not a blogger – suggest what you’d like to see bloggers in Ghana blog about with one voice? Are public hospitals in Ghana as high on professionalism as Lister Hospital? A-holes with ‘big’ cars in Accra avoid the traffic jams by driving in the oncoming lane and waving vehicles to get out of their way. How much will the clergy make in private gifts this Christmas? If they were taxed, wouldn’t it give Ghana enough money to improve education or health or roads?

Monkeys Dancing in T-Shirts

I rarely lose my way – or deliberately foray – into politics, but, sometimes, you cannot ignore visions of monkeys dancing on your nose.

In one of his earliest presidential speeches, the very-English-named president – John Evans Mills – tripped every step and said “ecomini” for “economy”. He was taunted for a while, and then it went away – or, did it?

There have always been rumours – there is an upsurge lately – that the leading opposition politician has dabbled in narcs and psychedelic substances. He ignored these for a long time until he felt compelled to deny it recently. One thought it had gone away – but had it?

This week, monkeys have come out dancing on every Ghanaian’s nose. T-shirts have appeared in town with “ecomini” printed on them. If it was a great commercial idea by some business man monkey, then other business men monkeys have come out with “1960s Funky Weed Days” T-shirts.

What can I say? Sooooooscket!

Laurent Gbagbo – Bush, Crazy Child

Musical chairs. Enfant terrible wriggles his way to the final. When the music suddenly stops, Enfant Terrible is still standing; stunned second. He bawls out to his family, who come to karate-kick the poor winning child off the champion’s chair. Now, Enfant Terrible is perched on the seat. He feels supremely stupid in his skin, but pretends to have retained a speck of self-dignity. Urchin. Vermin. Bush crazy child. Why did not his mother terminate the pregnancy?

Ghana’s 2010 Memorials

2010 has wickedly whizzed by, before our best-laid plans have got grip. If you were quizzed about Ghana’s most memorable moments in this low-yield year, what would you venture? To make matters murkier, let’s exclude football’s fascinating World Cup.