Public Offence

Public nose-picking
Because you'll roll the bogey around on your finger, and then try to shake hands with me!

Using a tooth pick in public
There must be a reason why your lips were made to cover your gums (and teeth)!

Shouting on the phone
I may be far away, but your mouth is to my ear!

Breaking traffic rules!
Because my dog could drive better than you!

People who stare at you in the traffic jam
Get a life, don't compare or size me up!

Many more things...
Get a life, I have work to do!

My Childhood Arch Enemies

It is a big, furry fuzz in my mind right now, but, even in those early days, I had discovered the superiority of brain over brawn, mind over muscle. It must be that group of boys (and I am not a wuss): Koo Prince, Manfred, Kwaku Bawuah, etc, etc, who would form two kung-fu, kick-ass posses, and hector one another and everybody else at snack time. O how I hated them!

Obama in Japanese & Other Random Questions

What is this craze in the Japanese form of names?
What is this other craze with joonas.net?
Who’d have thought Chrysler would go bankrupt?
Should the UK have entered Iraq at all?

Multi-Tasking in the Toilet

My office mates and I were bartering wisdom on how to bank our first millions of dollars, when Office Female #2 traipsed in. Faulting our after-hours chatter as thick-too-staid to spark and sizzle in the bored brain, she introduced the simple question: Can you pee and poo at the same time?

The quaint question set us thinking, but no sure answer came. Recall to the early morning did not unravel the mundane mystery: whether Necessity Number 1 could take place simultaneously with Necessity Number 2. Mock muscular movement would not settle the matter either, so we made an all-round resolution to pay particular attention the next morning.

Swine Flu & Other Random Fears

And now, it's Swine Flu
Looking for me and you
And the undefeated Taliban
Looking to take Pakistan!

Sick Love

She only asks a question;
He slaps her for an answer;
She holds where it hurts;
She apologises! They hug each other!
She apologised? Huh?

How Miss Jackson Listens to the Radio

Miss Jackson lies hushed, facing the ceiling with her eyes tightly closed. Slowly stretching out her hand, she feels and fumbles for the little dial. The sonic stations sail by, as she furrows her eyebrows to focus. She flits past a sound-spurt, and inches back till it’s finely tuned in stereo. She folds her hands across her tranquil torso, slackens the tautness back to her soft face, allows herself a victory smile, and, then, she slides into repose mode again. Miss Jolly Jackson doesn’t care a jack plug what station she listens to. If she likes what she hears, the dial stays put.