Rat Race v Human Race

Question:
What's the difference between a Rat Race and the Human Race?

Answer:
A Rat Race is run by humans, not rats; the Human Race has some 'rats' in it, but no running at all.

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Adultery

Why doesn’t “Adultery” mean doing the things that adults do, like lying habitually, or having sex, or having sex with other people’s people, or treating children like they’re small? Anything that adults typically do...

Can Cantata Get Any Tarter?

I accept that we mustn’t criticise creativity too cruelly or we could crush and cremate it. But, please, would some maundering meddler kindly clarify how “Cantata” crept onto national TV in the first place?

A Big-Bad-Wolf in Every Office?

Does every job-hunting girl, in this bitty city, have to fob off randy Big-Bad-Wolves, if she's remotely pretty? Pity! So if there's a 3-man interview committee, won't she get through if she's witty? Does she still need to give all 3 the 'kitty'?

Get Your Hand Out of My Face

In a public building’s restroom, I asked an egressing (and regressive) man, “Don’t you want to wash your hands?” Knowing, as I do, that so many people have tacky toilet habits, and seeing, as we do, that handshaking is just like that in glorious Ghanaian culture, I find myself thinking in 2 out of every 3 greeting situations: Get your hand out of my face. Throw in the predilection for public nose-picking, and the panic becomes: Get your effing hand out of my face!

Lifted by a Dress

Accra, 6.30 a.m. In the thwarting traffic, I wolfed a woman in a dapper dress. Oh, it was russet and sienna and Sea Island cotton ... and more hues of brown and red. It choc’d her brown skin in a warmer glow, and rolled her dynamo hips under its windswept flow. The simplicity and style took me whole, and helium’d my spirits for the rest of the morning.

No Rules, Just Food

Life is claustrophobic enough, as it is, without mentally growing grey about BMI, and cholesterol (which, like angels, comes in good and evil variants) and bland balanced diets. We should simply eat and drink some (but not Nero’s portions) of everything.