Saturday, August 30, 2008

The Sum of All Relationships

How perplexing can life be! Imagine yourself in this state:

‘I trust you! But I’m unhappy that you are getting close to XYZ. I really trust you, and have no reason to doubt you, but I’m afraid that you’ll fall for XYZ, and cheat on me or leave me completely. And, yet, I trust you.’

There was a day Maya, Nuti, Eric and I tried to find a meaning of the foundation of all good relations without a dictionary. We wished to get as true and personal as possible. The theme that sounded repeatedly was ‘the peace of mind to expect that no harm will be done to you by a particular person.’ Let’s vacate the point a moment and go on to two closely related feelings, this time going by what ‘Oxford’ says.

The first has two primary meanings. One – a feeling of anger or unhappiness because somebody you like or love is showing interest in somebody else. Two – a feeling of anger or unhappiness because you wish you had something that somebody else has.

The second emotion is defined as ‘the fear or suspicion of other people when there is no evidence of this.’

Trust – the belief that somebody or something is good, sincere, honest etc, and will not try to harm or trick you.’

I reckon that there is a healthy chance of every relationship having some of all these feelings. I have come to believe that giving too much space to any one will lead to the same consequence – HURT!

If you’re still wondering what the full list is, they are Trust, Jealousy and Paranoia.

4 comments:

  1. Nana,
    hmmmmmmmmmnnn

    TRUST:
    That's not a word i like to associate with...

    i simply believe any human being is capable of anything under the naked sun...

    RESPECT:
    that is my word! i love it. and i would put my heart out for it. Not trust!

    so yeah, relationships come under all kinds of 'hits'...but sure if there is RESPECT...then i believe whatever happens, there would be respect! (heeehehehe- did i just say that?) hahahahaha

    but seriously, respect is the first Aid. jealousy...could be a little sweet canny thing that could grow and turn sour...and paranioa is not worth it...

    peace!

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  2. Nov, I respect your own RESPECT for things in life, and trust that there are good reasons for your mistrust of TRUST. But don't you think that if it really came to choice between the two, TRUST is even more important in LOVE than RESPECT? :-)

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  3. ‘I trust you! But I’m unhappy that you are getting close to XYZ. I really trust you, and have no reason to doubt you, but I’m afraid that you’ll fall for XYZ, and cheat on me or leave me completely. And, yet, I trust you.’

    This, Nana,is powerful. That you found the words to describe this unyielding emotion is special. Great paragraph.

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  4. devlin, thanks. i've lived with this feeling for so long that i know its character inside out.

    ReplyDelete

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