A woman is carnal with a mere-familiar in order to feed and clothe her kids, while her husband is away on an expedition for the good of the nation. What is wrong with that? My history-loving and traditional uncle said this to me. He says it is different from sleeping around, which is a modern-day, cosmo-city, western-culture import. I have no thoughts on this, beyond bewilderment. Do you have any?
My thoughts? Gimme your uncle's background first.
ReplyDeleteAsk you Uncle if he will be happy for his wife to do that...let's see what he says!
ReplyDelete@ Anon"
ReplyDeleteNoooooo! Lol.
Oh Abeeku, could I do that? ;-)
ReplyDeleteI agree with him that it is different from sleeping around. Difference is, she slept with one person.
ReplyDeleteHowever, sleeping around (> 2 partners) is not a mordern day thing.
There has always been an area slut.
What changed is our age. We are now closely related to the area sluts. Someone we went to school with. Someone we used to go to church with. We are older now and understand what they are doing.
Do we hold men to the same standards - ie. the promiscuous man = area slut???
ReplyDeleteI'm not saying that men are necessarily the yardstick for anything, but perhaps more women are sleeping around for the same reasons men have been sleeping around for years. And if we haven't questioned these reasons for centuries now, why are we raising eyebrows at the female player-esses?
So yes, most likely modernity/western import, but it's A-OK!... says I:-)
I thoroughly disagree with your uncle about sleeping around being a Western phenomenon. However, this woman who is sleeping with 'merely' one person in order to feed/ clothe her children is engaging in glorified prostitution imho. Sex in order to gain something= prostitution. But if they're cool with that, then who am I to judge?
ReplyDelete@ Ghana Hall of Shame:
ReplyDeleteMy uncle did not mean that she was sleeping with only 1 person. What he meant was if she needed meat, she slept with the hunter. If she needed grain or legume, she slept with the farmer. If she needed a door fixed, the carpenter, etc.
The difference is, I think he meant that to sleep around is done for pleasure or state of mind rather than necessity for one's family's benefit.
@ yeh:
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comment. One person takes a clear ...ish position.
@ Sankofa:
ReplyDeleteI agree that to sleep around is a choice. Again, I remind you that my uncle did not necessarily mean that she sleeps around with only 1 man.
I just will add that if the traditional government which had taken her husband away to war had provided for his family, she would not have had to do what she did!
a slut is a slut is a slut...no matter the period in history or culture.
ReplyDeleteWhy the use of the derogatory "slut?" It's so sexist... i didn't hear anyone labeling Tiger Woods - the man slut!
ReplyDeleteI'm not endorsing infidelity, just saying go easy on the judgmental/derogatory labels, when we all know it's more pervasive than we like to admit!
ReplyDelete@ Yeh:
ReplyDeleteKnowing Kwame personally, may I venture that he used "slut" in the neuter?
@ Yeh:
ReplyDeleteWell, Tiger Woods was a slut no?
I vehemently disagree with your uncle that "sleeping around" is a western thing. We have become too ready to heap all things negative on the west - e.g. is sodomy.
ReplyDeleteSleeping around is African, very African - and we totally love it!!!
Remember "me suro wo gyam fita".
@kissi. i agree lol
ReplyDeleteAfricans are just as bad and guilty of the same. There are more "swingers" and "hussies/sluts" than there are in the western world: If you are asking, statistics reveal this NY Asiedu lol
ReplyDelete@Sankofa and NY Asiedu did i just hear u say to sleep around is a choice? No comment.
ReplyDelete@sankofa nd ny asiedu, if u both think sleeping around is a choice, then i am thinking that you just confirmed this is a bigger problem than it is in the western world. In the western world where the drunken culture is prevalent, most pple tend to sleep around/have one night stands when intoxicated by alcohol. for some, it is an addiction, they require extensive therapy to beat this habit.
ReplyDeleteTell me which is worse, sleeping around when you are aware it is wrong or sleeping around due to intoxication/some addiction?
Me thinks, sleeping around when you is know it is wrong is more serious than the other. This confirms africans are true sluts and swingers. Sorry if i sounded really harsh, i am African too.
Is there a more polite way of saying it?
ReplyDelete@kwame mensa-Bonsu: a "Polyamorist" and the "Ultimate Femme Fatale". Sounds better?
ReplyDelete